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You Should Never Float the River During a Storm
Here’s a warning to you and your friends,
Listen closely—I’m about to begin.
Never float down a river in a tube,
When there is lightning, there will be doom.
 
I’m still around to tell the tale
About the time I regret setting sail.
The weather only seemed just a little gray—
I had no idea there’d be lightning that day.
 
Floating down the river, not a care to be found,
That was until I heard a frightening sound.
Cracks of lightning in beautiful dances...
I wasn’t scared—what were the chances?
 
So I kept floating down the stream,
Then all of a sudden, I was struck by a beam.
I got zapped so hard—it happened so fast,
My body arched like a demon being cast.
 
My tube exploded, my flip-flops flew,
My eyebrows vanished (yes, it's true).
I hit the shore like a soggy log,
Crawled out looking like a crispy frog.
 
So if the clouds start looking dark,
And thunder rolls across the park,
Don't be like me, all fried and warm—
You should never float the river during a storm.
 
(Inspired by a man who went tubing without his girlfriend. Nature noticed.)

You Should Never Float the River During a Storm

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